*I decided to move it here because I don't think it belongs in the about me section. This is only a glimpse into my life!* (Originally posted August 14)
I don't know where to begin... Stumbled on to this site from google because I was looking up information about Aplastic Anemia. It's a disease where your bone marrow can't produce your blood cells, usually because of a autoimmune disorder, meaning that your immune system is attacking the stem cells that produce your blood cells. I used to have it. It's considered a life threatening disease that you live with for the rest of your life unless you get a bone marrow transplant, and I haven't had one. But I don't like to say that, I believe words have power, so when I speak about it, I say I used to have it. I had drug therapy to treat it and I'm healthy now, not 100%, but healthy, so I consider my self cured. As far as I can tell anyway, I lost my health insurance in 2006. But anyway doctors however consider it being in remission.
I've been okay for years now, but every once in a while something will happen to make me think about when I used to be sick. I googled Aplastic Anemia and pregnancy. I never thought about it before, I was only 16 when I got sick. But I'm 23 now and I have found the love of my life and I wanted to know how it would affect me. I thought maybe there was a risk to the baby, a risk genetically as far as who I have a child with. But none of that was a problem. What I found out was that I could get sick again by getting pregnant. That scares me so much.
Apparently getting pregnant is actually a CAUSE of Aplastic Anemia. Even more surprising the first known case of Aplastic Anemia was in a pregnant woman. I guess I could handle the idea of a baby that doesn't exist yet being sick better than me getting sick again. Does that make me a horrible person? All my life, I just wanted to be normal, I've never had a normal life. Even before getting sick my life was pretty abnormal and bad (something I'll talk about in later posts). The minute I think it can't get worst than this it does. 2x. I felt like starting a new family, my OWN family would be a fresh start, and now I might even be denied that.